I must admit the past few days I have struggled with words; I was actually so worried that I had run out of topics to blog about. Anyway today at work something happened that got me thinking, about marriage and settling down etc. Just hear me out I have not decided that I want to get married or anything like that it was just today’s occurrences that got me thinking.
We have a lady at work who has not been working there for a very long time however she has that type of personality that everyone gets along with her, she came to speak to myself and a colleague today, now I have NO idea how we got onto this topic but she had asked my colleague if he was single, he confirmed that he had been single for almost a year, so she said he needs to get out more and meet people etc. You know the usual that people say when they come across a “single” person like as if it is a terrible thing to be single. Then she went on to saying that she will find him someone …LOL, he then told her that he does get out and meet people (women) through friends etc but they are not his type meaning they are not right for him, maybe they drink too much and he hardly drinks etc. Once again she said she would find him someone.
Then she asked me, and I said the same thing and she basically told me the same thing that she will try and find me someone with the same interests as me.
Now at this point I was intrigued by this whole topic so brought up the question why is it she thinks she needs to help us find “Love” so to speak, we pretty capable of doing that ourselves too. The thing is when you are single people seem to make assumptions that either there is something wrong with you or perhaps you not working hard enough at finding someone… never once do they say oh ok you single because that’s what you want.
I have just turned 31, and I am single and quite frankly that does not bother me in the slightest, although I am being harassed by my family “when you getting married?” “When will you settle down?” You are not getting any younger you know! Etc. You see I dated a few guys and none of them were right, I have suffered rejection like most people have so I made the decision that I was no longer going to rush into something i.e. a relationship just for the sake of being in one. Let me try to put it more plainly, if you buy a bag of apples and the WHOLE bag except 1 apple is rotten, what are you going to do? Are you going to eat all those rotten apples and then eat the apple that’s the best… or will you just eat the good apple, think about it I know that is a bit of a silly comparison but it’s true, I am not going to go through all the bad apples first and THEN eat the good one, just the same as I am not going to go into a relationship if I do not feel that its right.
I firmly believe that God has big plans for me for all of us, and when the time is right, it will be according to his plan for my life whether that is now, a year from now, or 10 years from now it does not matter, and people need to accept that, not all of us are dependent on having a significant other. Oh and I have seen that before where people are so dependant of another person that they are too scared to end abusive relationships because they are TOO afraid of being alone… but in reality being alone is not the problem.
The problem is who you are depending on, don’t depend on other people depend on God, and allow Him to fulfil His plan for your life only then will you KNOW when something is right. The way I see it is God did not create for us each 20 soul mates we each have 1 and why should I continue to waste my time on something that is going nowhere?
Genesis 2:24 – For this reason a man will leave his mother and father and be united to his wife, and they will become 1 flesh.
So there you have it it’s obvious, it does not say that 10 men will leave their parents to marry the same wife, or vice versa it says A MAN (meaning 1 man) will leave his mother and father and be united with his wife.
Matthew 19:6 – So they are no longer two, but one, therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.
Here it says they are no longer 2 but 1 not 5 but 1. So I no longer will waste my time being in a relationship “just because” that is what is acceptable in society or because that is what people want from me, it’s not what other people want that matters to me it’s WHAT GOD wants that matters.
Yes everyone likes having that other person around, to share things with, someone that is not family but also not just a friend, I will be the first to admit that it IS nice having someone around, but when you sit and think about it, does that relationship have any MEANING at all when it is not what God wants, is it still so nice when at the end of the day you are headed for a dead end street, no its not because someone always gets hurt.
Spending your life with someone is a HUGE commitment, not one to be taken lightly either. A friend wrote a blog some time ago about marriage and that if you get married you need to be a warrior as it is a commitment that is made between 2 people and you can’t just up and leave when things get tough which is what so many married and unmarried couples do today, that is why it is SO important that you make the right choices in life, here is a link to his post go and take a read.
Lions Lead – “For Better or Worse… Really? Hope you all enjoyed this post as much as I have.