Blog Archives

Crippling Negative Thoughts

negative-thinkingOK, so it’s been a VERY long time since I have posted here, from posting almost every day to 1 post in a blue moon, honestly it’s not because I did not want to but because I had nothing to write about, no inspiration, no stories to tell, no thoughts to share.

I must admit I do miss it as it was a release, or perhaps even an escape from reality, which sort of makes sense considering in the past year I haven’t had that need to escape, the need to run the need to be alone with my thoughts, the past year has been amazing, I have had so much happiness.

This is why I am here today. I know I have posted something similar before but I felt the need to do so again, somehow it all feels too good to be true as if I do not deserve all this happiness and it could be ripped away at any moment. These negative thoughts started creeping in my mind last night while my boyfriend was packing to go away for a conference, you see HE is the source of my recent happiness, I don’t remember the last time I have been this happy as I have been with him.

What you are about to read has been something I have struggled with for many years, but yesterday it came back with such an intensity that I started to cry. While you read this you might think I am crazy but I can assure you I am not, and unless you have experienced this there is no way for you to understand what it feels like to have these thoughts invade your mind and then when they are there to struggle to change them from a negative to a positive.

While my boyfriend was packing I looked at him and suddenly the thought that I would never see him again was all I could think about, these thoughts are not only scary but almost crippling, all I could think about was, what if… what if something happened and he never came home, where does that leave me… it got to the point that if I had remained in the room with him I would have burst into tears. so I got up and went to shower, in the shower the feelings just overwhelmed me and I could not stop the tears from coming, that did not last long though I stood in the shower and the first thing that came to my mind was GOD & CHURCH… why ??? I have no idea but it did. So I prayed for Shaun’s Safety and that he would return home to me. I then realized that my relationship with God has not been what it was. So I made a promise to not only fix that but to try and get Shaun to accept Him as well.

After showering I sat on the bed and thought to myself that I would discuss going back to church with  Shaun some other time, but something kept telling do it now, if you don’t do it now you never will. So I decided to tell Shaun and I did, he responded better than I had hoped he said it’s something he has been thinking about as well and that he is all open to us going to church.

So that is what we will be doing and it feels good.

There is still one thing though the negative thoughts while they went away last night after my decision they came back today, but now as writing this the negative thoughts are once again gone, however I know at some point they will return, does anyone else suffer from kind of anxiety and how do you deal with it?

It will be nice to hear from you guys.


The Versatile Blogger award

WOW, A big thank you to Princessnadielala for nominating me for the Versatile Blogger award, I have only been blogging for a very short while and this is the secod award that I have received, it is such a blessing to be nominated and that people are reading my Blogs and taking something meaningful from it, the aim of my blog is to inform people about Jesus, it has become so much more than just a Blog, it has become a dedication to Jesus.

Here are the rules for The Versatile Blogger Award:

1. In a post on your, blog, nominate 15 fellow bloggers for The Versatile Blogger Award.

2. In the same post, add the Versatile Blogger Award.

3. In the same post, thank the blogger who nominated you in a post with a link back to their blog.

4. In the same post, share 7 completely random pieces of information about yourself.

5. In the same post, include this set of rules.

6. Inform each nominated blogger of their nomination by posting a comment on each of their blogs.

7 completely random things about me….

1. I am so DEEPLY in love with God

2. I work at a Vet on saturdays

3. I love to cook

4. I have the craziest friends but I love them

5. I struggle to say no

6. I become as excited as a child at Christmas time and my birthday which is not far apart, so its days and days of excitement for me

7. I have discovered a passion for blogging

*Ahem drum roll please*

Here are my nominations for The Versatile Blogger Award


Lions Lead

I Am Rover – Travel Blog

By His Grace

Singular Spectrum

Define D.I.V.A

Featured Scribbles

The test of the Cross

Truth Pressure

GGG Ceo’s Blog

Surviving the Storm

AJ Poetry

Abbas Girl Me

Jennifer’s Hope

Reaching Finland

Stuff that’s Relevant

These are all blogs that I follow and read on a regular basis. I hope you will be as blessed as me when reading it.

Click Here!!!!!

Hello Bloggers, well well well you clicked my post, that was pretty easy I’d say, now let’s see how many of you have read this post right to the end.


The title to today’s post was click here, it’s bound to make you curious, and it did that is why you are here not so?… now let’s say I changed the title of my blog to say click here for great freebies, would you have clicked?… I would have. What about if the title was click here to win a car??? Would you have clicked it…? I definitely would have no doubt.

But what if I changed the topic to, Jesus loves you… click here for more info? How many of you would have clicked on my post? Those numbers would have dropped I am sure… or what if I made the topic… Jesus would love for you to get to know Him better click here…. would you have clicked?? Again I am sure the numbers would drop.


Why is that? Is it because you do not believe in Jesus? Is it because you are too busy to know Jesus?? If that’s the case then why are you still here and why did you then click my post? Because surely if you too busy for Jesus then you too busy to read this post too?? (Don’t get me wrong I am GLAD you did) So here is the real topic of this post, and I pray that you will read to the end.


God Loves YOU, he wants to be a part of your life… Are you going to invite him in?


For many years I have been a believer in Jesus, but although I went to church and was involved that was about it, it was all on the surface but if you had to scratch a little deeper you would see I was a person that did the wrong things, the partying, drinking etc. I never really took God seriously. Up until recently that is.


Let’s take a look at scripture verses:


John 3:16–18:

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved [attain wholeness].

He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.


God sent his son for us so that we could be saved I mean how awesome is that, those of you that are parents? How many of you can actually say that you would make that sacrifice? So what does that say about God? What does that say about the amazing love he has for each and every one of us?


1 Peter 5:7:

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).


It is clear, he wants you to give him all your worries and burdens because he cares for you….


Ephesians 2:4-5: 

But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.


Now contrary to what you might think, I am not one of those people who will try and force you to do something that you don’t want to do, I don’t want to force you to believe in Jesus, or force you to accept him as your Saviour, I merely want to tell you that you are missing out on the most AMAZING love ever.


You are missing out on Blessings; you are missing out on healing. You are missing out on a relationship with your creator.


Now let’s take a look at the life of Christopher Hitchens: (13 April 1949 – 15 December 2011) was a British-American author and journalist whose books, essays, and journalistic career spanned more than four decades (Taken from Wikipedia). Christopher Hitchens, was an atheist, he mocked God, he even went as far as writing a book called God is not Great. In fact his friend Rick Warren himself said on twitter and I quote “My friend Christopher Hitchens has died. I loved and prayed for him constantly & grieve his loss. He knows the Truth now”. This made me wonder where his final resting place is. We do not know for sure, who knows maybe all the praying that Rick Warren did for him planted the seed, and maybe in his last dying moments he asked God to forgive him and come into his life, we can never know, I pray that he did, or should I say I HOPE he did, because to pray for that now would be pointless.


Which now brings me to my next question…? If you wear to die right now, for whatever reason it doesn’t really matter I suppose, but if you died right now do you know where you would go? Heaven or hell? Or maybe you are like Christopher Hitchens, and you do not believe that God even exists, and that this post means absolutely nothing to you and that you think I am some Bible basher that knows nothing, would you not rather be safe than sorry. I would rather die having the assurance that I will go to heaven, and if I pass on and there is in fact no heaven or hell (which I doubt) then I have lost nothing, but if I died without accepting Jesus into my life and got to heaven and was told sorry you can’t come in your final accommodation is hell then I have lost everything.


I am just not prepared to take that chance, are you?


If you have not been accepted Jesus Christ into your life—let me invite you to surrender yourself to him now.

Romans 10:13

For everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.

Give your life to God by accepting Jesus as your Saviour and Lord. Let me invite you to read the following as a prayer.

Dear God, I declare that I am a sinner. Please forgive my sins and accept me as your child. I invite you to be my Saviour and the Lord of my life. I surrender myself to you in the name of Jesus Christ, my Saviour and Lord.



That was the first step, in order for you to really experience the love of God you really need to build that relationship with him, get to know him by reading the bible, praying and just fellowshipping with him, you might not hear him but he can hear you even when no words come out of your mouth, and slowly but surely he will reveal himself to you little by little.


If you are still reading this then I thank you, and I pray that a seed has been planted in your heart, that if you have not accepted Jesus that you will do so whether now or next week or next year that you will accept him.


That is the purpose of my blog, to win souls for Jesus.


May God Bless you.

Time to Focus

The Pastor said in church on Sunday that which you focus on or meditate on becomes an extension of WHO YOU ARE!!

This statement has been on my mind since then, I am sure most of us know what it means to focus, but I will give you one very simple meaning for focus that I have recently come across

Find a project.

Occupy yourself with this project.

Concentrate all your time on this project.

Understand that nothing is more important than this project.

Succeed with this project.

While this is quite a good explanation of the word FOCUS, I still feel that it is not completely true, because there should be NO ONE or NOTHING more important than Jesus. So I have changed it slightly to suit me.

Find Jesus

Occupy myself with Jesus.

Concentrate all my time on Jesus.

Understand that nothing is more important than Jesus.

Succeed with Jesus.

This will become the rules by which I live from now onwards, it is simple and easy to remember. So basically the way I see it is if I focus or meditate on Jesus, I will become more like him, and is that not what he wants? For us to be more like him!

So how do we do this? Well a good start would be to pray, then spend time with him by reading his word there are many scriptures that refer to spending time with Jesus and also becoming like him, I have found a few but I am sure there are MANY more.

Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.


1 Peter 2:2: Like new-born infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation


1 John 2:6: Whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked.


 1 Corinthians 11:1: Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ


What are other ways that you can FOCUS on Jesus?

  • Go to church regularly
  • Surround yourself with other Christians
  • Get yourself some Christian literature – there are so many amazing books out there.
  • Get yourself some Christian music – same here there are so many AMAZING gospel artists out there; you are bound to find something you can listen to.  For me I want to be able to sing along to the music, so any music that I can enjoy and sing along to I will love.

This is what I have done, I have surrounded myself with all these things, and chosen to listen to Christian CD’s on my way to and from work or in fact any time I get in the car, I Can never grow tired of it.

So I have pledged to FOCUS, have YOU?

Have a blessed day everyone!

What is love?… God is LOVE.

I was not going to write a post today but after coming home from church I feel I must, a few days ago a friend or should I say a brother in Christ, wrote a very touching blog that brought me to tears, when you done reading this I recommend that you take a read, and follow him and I can guarantee you that you will be blessed beyond measure, God is working through him in his writing, I have read all of his blogs, and this one by far has been the most inspirational to me, it is called Pierced by your loving gaze, in this blog he speaks of God’s amazing love for all of us, he begins by saying that he used to be one of the guys that didn’t cry but its different for him now, he goes on to mention that he was listening to a song by Michael W Smith – Deep in love with you, after reading his blog, I sat and thought to myself that if this song had brought him to tears, that this song had brought a grown man to tears then it MUST be a powerful song, so I decided to go and get myself the CD.

I went to church this morning, it was a new church that is closer to home, I was reluctant to go as I felt as though my usual church was my home, and that I would not be happy in any other church but because my church is so far away, I decided I would try the church 5 minutes from my house as it is very much like my church.

Something amazing happened to me today, I can’t quite explain it except that God’s love is so amazing. I walked through the doors of this church, and I won’t tell you a word of a lie, when I put the first step inside the church I started to cry, I felt the most amazing sense of Love, like nothing I have ever experienced, just when I think God’s love cannot be any more amazing and never-ending I am engulfed with another wave of love even stronger than the last. All through the praise and worship I had tears in my eyes, I could not understand why I was crying, but the other day this same friend told me those times that I cry I must enjoy it, so I did. I cried with a smile on my face. J

After the service I went into the book shop and bought the CD that had this song on, I got in my car and put the CD on, I skipped to track 8 and I cried even more. It is indeed a very powerful song, but then while driving home I came across another song, one that I have heard before… Majesty

It goes something like this…

Singing Majesty…. Majesty…

Your grace has found me just I am, empty handed but alive in your hands

Singing Majesty, were singing Majesty

Forever I am changed by your love in the presence of your majesty….

When this song played I cried like a baby, just there and then I felt like NO ONE and NOTHING could compare to the Lord, NO ONE and NOTHING was as important as Jesus, I felt as though nothing else mattered, all the problems, all the pain, all the issues were gone, it was just me and God, he was there I felt him, the intensity of the love that I felt cannot be compared to any other form of love that any human can provide, it far surpasses everything and everyone in my life, the past few days, have been this unbelievable and amazing journey, I have felt the presence of God more and more each day, but today…. today is the day I felt truly BORN AGAIN, today was the day that I was transformed from being a broken down person to being a child of God, as it was intended to be.

Do you know what GOD’s Calling is??

I firmly believe we have all been put here for a reason, God did not just create us to eat the forbidden fruit, and get on with our sinful lives, and completely disregard everything Hestands for  and everything He is!

So why are we here? Why did He create me? And why did He create YOU!!! Have you asked yourself that recently? I ask myself that question ALL the time, even this morning I asked myself what is my purpose in life, so that’s why this blog is about God’s calling on my life.

I have yet to figure this one out, but it is now my mission to do so. I don’t have a clue what He wants me to do, but I know deep down He wants to use me in some way or other. I surrender myself to Him right now and believe that whatever He wants I will find out soon enough.

I am sure He has told me before, but I just have not been listening to Him. I intend to make more of an effort in my life to listen to Him and hear Him when He speaks.

He is ever present in our lives, in everything we see He is there we just don’t realise it. We take HIM for granted. When last have you gone outside and taken a good look outside?? Like really looked at your surroundings?? Do yourself a favour and go outside today, look at the grass for instance who else BUT GOD could have created every blade of grass to perfection? Look at the flowers the many different kinds, He created every flower to be unique and a masterpiece, look at the details of the flowers, can you make that?…. sure you can but it will be synthetic and fake… is that the same as God’s creation NO its not.  He put us on this earth with all these things to enjoy. My question is how do I SAY thank you GOD, how do I show Him MY gratitude for all this? I think it is to live the life He wants for you the life He had planned for you long before you were even conceived. Your blueprint is with GOD and it is magnificent, All you have to do is listen to Him and hear His voice

I have found some scriptures that are reference to the CALLING of the Lord on your life. The only time you will understand and realize what his purpose for you is to spend time with Him, take the time talk to Him, He wants so badly for all of us to have fellowship with Him and have a relationship with Him where we can turn to Him not only in times of need but in ALL times, whether we happy or sad turn to Him. As a friend told me yesterday when I was feeling a little down…. “HE loves you, you KNOW”. Just those few words brought tears to my eyes.

Romans 11:29: For God’s Gifts and his CALL can never be withdrawn

Ephesians 4:1: Live a life worthy of the calling you have received

Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” 

Jeremiah 29:12-13: “Then when you call upon Me and come and pray to Me, I will hear you. When you search for Me, You will find Me; if you seek Me with all your heart

Ephesians 2:10: ” For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” 

There are so many scriptures that refer to the calling of GOD, let us listen.