It’s almost the end of the year, this is the time that a lot of us take to reflect on the past year, what happened, or did not happen, which events we will remember for the rest of our lives and which ones we would prefer to forget.
If I look back at this year nothing phenomenal happened that I want to remember or forget. The only thing for me that was so dramatic was the death of my uncle. I was very close with him, and loved him dearly. With his death came a lot of unanswered questions and heart ache, for so many people. It was definitely a can of worms that had been opened.
For as long as I can remember I had the suspicion that my uncle was Gay, but I just figured it was his life and his choice who am I to judge. He had been sick for some time, it all started when he came back from Africa, I think it was Zambia to be exact, on his way home he made a stop over by us for a few days and then went back to Cape Town. He was already sick then, but he had blamed it on Africa that he had contracted TB of the brain, and we believed him. About 6 months later we got a call that he had been admitted into hospital and that we had to come down as the doctors were not sure if he would pull through. We were on the next available flight. We sat by his bedside he never recognised us. But as we were about to leave he spoke to us and for a few minutes he knew who we were, he told my brother that he must look after his kids and wife and that he must be there for them.
My brother had left the room then and I got up to kiss him on the forehead and leave when he grabbed my hand and told me that I must not worry and that I will be ok. I cling on to those words, it was not the last time I spoke to him but the last time I saw him alive. That day my aunt had told us what was really wrong with him, she told us that he was dying of AIDS. I was beyond shocked; words cannot explain how I felt it was like I got the wind knocked out of me. He recovered and went home but not for long. A couple of months later we got the call that he passed away, it was a loss that we struggled with he was like my father.
We went down for the funeral, and once again my Aunt revealed more shocking truths about my uncle and the life he had lived, I will not go into too much detail but what I can say is that it is the kind of stuff you see on TV. I was angry and hurt, I was upset at the funeral, and I cried but I cried more for my aunt than for my uncle. What he had put her through; her whole marriage was a lie.
Why have I revealed all this to people I do not know, well it got me thinking about death and where I go when I die, I believe 100% without a doubt that there is a Heaven and a hell, there is a God and a devil. Yet, there those who do not believe at all and live their lives as they wish. My uncle was a religious man believe it or not, he prayed every day, but did he just do that because that is what he was brought up to do his whole life or did he accept Jesus into his life?? I know that living the life he lived he was living in sin, which means he is sitting in hell right now, however I would like to believe that he repented and asked for God’s forgiveness before his death and that he is now in fact in heaven.
If you are one of those that do not believe in heaven or hell or that Jesus is THE ONLY way to the Father, the ONLY way into heaven, where do you think you will end up once you die? Me personally, if I were in that position I would choose to follow the Lord whether I believed or not, I would rather not take the chance, have you asked yourself what if we are right what if there IS a God? Well there is one, I have been through so much in my life and throughout all of those experiences God was there, and he protected me and guided me to make the right choices. I cannot imagine my life without him.
At the end of the day only you can make the choice whether you choose to follow God or your own choices, I made the choice to follow God to accept all his blessings and to secure my place in heaven. What choice are you going to make, yes you will probably ask me how I know for sure that he really does exist, well I know for sure because of how he has worked in me and in my life, but I cannot prove that to YOU, so think of it this way WOULD YOU NOT RATHER BE SAFE THAN SORRY…. I KNOW I WOULD.
I cannot be 100% sure of where my uncle is right now, which has made me even more determined to follow the Lord, I have decided to rather be SAFE THAN SORRY and you?
My Journey with God 